Single Mothers Rule the World

..well, at least you would think so, with the amount of credit that Ann Coulter gives them. Apparently single mothers victimize others according to recent interviews and her book chapter entitled "Victim of a crime? Thank a single mom." With that kind of blather published by Crown Publishing Group, I have gained real hope that I will become a book author, since my standards for content are incomparably higher.

Oh and another excellent supposition by the blatherer: the liberal media promotes single motherhood. Yeah, that's right, if you replace the word "promotes" with "supports"....just a BIG difference, actually. No one is ADVOCATING for more young ladies to grow up to become single mothers. Liberals don't dream up princess stories about becoming a single mom when they grow up. Rather, liberals are just practical enough to know that it happens, that it is REALITY, and they try to be supportive. What's the alternative? Is Ann Coulter promoting abortion? Or would she rather exterminate pregnant unmarried woman? What's the use in her rhetoric?

And that brings me to my next point. Her rhetoric is utterly useless. There's no solution that comes out of her blather, just as there's no wisdom either from that childless spinster. Truly, her suppositions are broad generalizations, and as always generalizations are false in many case and point examples. For example, she is blonde and skinny, so applying her (lack of) thinking approach, I would have to assume that she is a dumb, bulimic, bimbo, who can't drive.


Ooooo, I just slammed women and why do that; I'm female? Just another example illustrating why part of the reason the whole attack by Ann Coulter seems so hurtful, is because it seems that she's targeting her own. But really, considering what a venomous bitch she is, I guess she hasn't; she hasn't uttered a single hurtful sling at female snakes.

Scripted

Recently, in a social network conversation, I was told that my response was "scripted" and "liberal". I found myself plummeted back into the recent memories of the Republican propaganda machine, where good qualities were magically transformed into questionable traits. In this special take on the world, excellence in discourse is deemed "talking above the American public" and even meanness, and responses like "You Betcha" and winking is considered real American language. I guess a portion of the American public believes that international diplomacy is better done with being nice and showing a little leg? I can see that going over well in a visit to Parliament. Expertise, and heaven forbid, an advanced qualification is considered elitist in this crazy world. I wouldn't necessarily agree with that, as the US Census Bureau data for 2007 indicates that 2,496,000 Americans have doctoral degrees. Doctoral programs are very accessible to the middle class, and entrance and completion of a PhD are primarily based on hard work and commitment, NOT connections-as is implied by "elitist" (unless we start talking about the Ivy League.)

Still, should having spent at least an estimated 20,000 hours devoted towards the study of one focused topic deem you more knowledgeable than the average person and worthy of being listened to on your studied topic? Probably. In fact, it may even be considered wise to listen the thoughts of a person who has devoted their life towards the pursuit of knowledge (often without reasonable compensation, and thus, no other motivation than "to know"), of course, concerning their area of expertise. It will always disturb me to ponder how well respected the opinions of celebrities are: people who have risen to their status based primarily upon looks, connections, and acting/singing talent. I would hazard a guess that none of those qualities make celebrities any better able to logically think, weigh out risks and benefits, analyze data, manage a business, or apply both detail-driven and global perspective to decision making.

So right. Scripted. Someone told me what to say or even better, I just copied it from the internet? Wrong. How about, my answer was well thought-out and well-written, thank you very much.

Generalisms are Clever

“Just goes to prove, women can’t drive!”

As you can imagine, I didn’t take kindly to that comment, uttered halfway through my shoveling of the 2 feet deep snow from the 10-foot length of driveway. This woman takes cares of things and does a damn good job. I wasn’t actually the target of the comment; although, I did catch the rebounding shrapnel from it, as did half of the American population. The deduction capabilities of the insulting grisly old man had much to be desired. (“Young” versus “Girl”? Let’s blame it on gender…) The car stuck in the 3-foot bank of snow was obviously the result of the lack of experience. The teenager driving the auto had had a license for less than a year and was experiencing her first snowfall with significant accumulation. Imagine…she didn’t know the tricks of handling the car in that setting! Shocking? That old man better never leave upstate NY, or he will quickly learn how inexperience and bad weather shouldn’t, but often DO mix…

My 6-year-old and I drove from Rochester, NY to Columbus OH two days later. The 6 hour 45 minute trip took just under 10 hours. Of course there were driving winds, slush, and beating freezing rain to contend with. Oh, and accidents so fresh on every highway that I traveled on that most of them did not have emergency personnel present yet…rather, only lights in the distance. And then, they started closing off parts of the road (although, a couple of us drove across the median to avoid the queue…I’m not implicating anyone in particular though.) And then 20 miles down that expressway, all the entrance ramps were blocked and cops corralled us off the road. I took a gamble with the first road that said south…a local road, but still ended up sitting for 30 minutes from another 3-car pileup. With a bit of direction, I found a connecting interstate that did minimal damage to lengthening my trip and soon it was just the truckers and I. Well, we did pass a sheriff at one point. And with such open road, despite pounding rain, I started to grip the steering wheel with less of an iron grasp. And just when my tensed back muscles started to let go a little, we came across another pileup—which included a lorry, and the car’s tires crunched as we passed the accident scene and the resulting shrapnel. Fear of blowing a tire in combination with the icy road surface had me sufficiently tensed for the rest of the journey. Nearly 2-dozen accidents from the start of our journey later, we arrived to our destination.

Wait, I forgot, I can’t drive.

*British female voice* "Hello. Your call cannot be taken at the moment and you cannot leave a message"

Wow. Well that doesn't leave me with many options, now does it. Call back again sure...[presses in the 12 numbers required to dial international numbers, again, an hour later]....same thing. Well, I guess that rules out the call-back option, too.

Am I being sensitive, or would you say I was being given the V-sign, the English equivalent of the middle finger, generally accompanied by "Fuck-off"? What if I also told you that the reason for the call was regarding a visa I applied for (including paying a $430 fee) 1 YEAR ago but have not even been considered for, due to technical issues with their application process? That this phone call was one in a bucket of phone calls (some at $3.00/minute), emails, visits to the Consulate (with travel costs totaling more than $1000) and faxes made over the past YEAR in an attempt to resolve this issue?

Well, good job to the British government for minimizing the immigrating and visiting riff raff, including those small business owners with PhD qualifications in science. I am feeling more than disheartened; I am feeling exhausted from the battle.

Love 0 points; British government 10 points.

Peace

One of the salient and sad aspects of the McCain-Palin campaign focused on presenting Obama as Muslim. (Recall chants of "McCain not Hussein!" at rallies for instance.) Millions of people in the world are proud to be Muslim, but here in the US, certain factions consider calling a person "Muslim" a way of name-calling. The reason? There is a negative connotation associated with "Muslim", an association with terrorist activities, for example. I find this to be very strange, given the long history of war and even terrorist activity associated with almost all religions, notably Catholicism.

As was aptly put by a professor of Islamic studies at George Washington University in Washington:

“Certainly we cannot claim that violence is the monopoly of only one religion.”

Truly any large group of people, regardless of where they live in the world, their ethnicity, or who they call god, will harbor a small extreme faction prone to violence. We cannot judge any group solely by their fringe faction(s) or we will find that we will be forced to bring judgment on ourselves as well.

Cheers to Americans!!!

I feel proud to be an American. Americans have come together and demonstrated that collectively we are beyond prejudice, that we will elect the right man for president, whether he is black or white. And I have never seen anyone who is so obviously the right man for president. President-elect Barack Obama is a brilliant, steady-handed, inspirational leader who has consistently made decisions out of principle, not ease or self-benefit. I will spend the next four years in tears, because even as early as the Democratic Convention speech in 2004, his words resonate with me so completely that I often tear up with happiness that he so completely "gets it."

Strange

Noel opened her eyes and told me straight away this morning:
"I wish I was allowed to call you 'Turkey' instead of 'Mommy.'"

There's some brilliance in there somewhere...I just can't put my finger on it. ;)

Noel told me tonight...

If you were at a shop,

I would buy you.

*heart warms*

McCain, please tell me,

Is recruiting Sarah Palin your best example of good decision making?

Can we expect more people of this quality in your dream US administration?

Debate Resuls

The results of the debate are in!!

Six-year-old Americans resoundingly support Barack Obama...I know because my daughter tallied the data:

And I quote...

*eyeslids shut*, a whisper is uttered...
"But first of all, before I get ready,

I DON"T WANT TO GO TO SCHOOL."

And there's the Monday morning blues.

Generation Gap

When posited the question, "What is the difference between texting and emailing on your phone?"
My Mom quickly replied, "In emails the words are spelled out."

In contrast, the wisdom of today's technology has filtered down to my 6-year-old. Any unknown. No worries, she'll point ya in the right direction. "Google it," she instructs.

Change?

I love the current Republican platform. "Change." Seriously? If that's what a voter is going for, then why vote for the same party that has screwed up our economy and foreign policy for the last 8 years?

Burning Question

I would truly appreciate some good advice on how to get a ticket to attend the upcoming presidential debates. I have a burning question. I have many misgivings about McCain, not least of which is his involvement in the Keating 5 scandal. I truly desire an opportunity to ask him what his involvement was, as I strongly feel that we need to have a president that we can trust with our currently fragile economy. The following is the current draft of the question that I would like to ask Senator McCain.

"In a time of economic crises for many Americans, I would like to know how we can trust you, Senator McCain, who was one of the Keating 5 of the 1989 Savings and Loan scandal with the American budget (put deeper into dept than ever during the Bush administration) or Governor Palin, who unlike the rest of the 49 States has had to "deal" with a 5 billion dollar surplus in her budget due to revenue from oil. Senator McCain please explain your involvement in the Keating 5 scandal."

Listeners Wanted

Dear Mr. Obama,

As a doctor (but “not the kind that helps people”) and single-mother who moved to the UK to escape the embarrassingly terrible policies of the Bush regime, I need to thoroughly thank you from the bottom of my heart. Thank you for dedicating your life to public service—a life that I realize cannot be easy. You have provided me for the first time with a candidate that I am supporting because you uphold the principles that I value, and stand for and issues that are key to the wellbeing of the United States, and indeed the world. I feel that you make choices based on what is right, not what is necessarily easy or lucrative. Please continue on that path; please continue to make me proud to be your supporter.

In return, for my birthday I am asking my conservative friends to listen to one of your speeches, and trading favors for the same, as well. Although I generally cringe at books in the “self-help” genre, for my mother-in-law, I will read “A New Earth: Awakening to Your Life’s Purpose” in exchange for her listening to your Democratic nomination speech. So, please continue to make me proud, indeed even often tearful with your words, and I will do my best to recruit listeners.

All my best,
Rebecca

Fairyland meets internet

Three mornings ago, Noel woke up declaring, "I believe in fairies!!!"


Then, she asked tonight...
"Does peter pan still come to windows?"

And the kicker, she also had a way to sort this out this very critical question, made all the more important because she has decided that she does not want to go grow up.

Even in the 6-year-old world, the all-knowing GOOGLE has made a presence.
She insisted that I get onto the computer and pose the question to google (which she even spelled out for me, just to make sure I got it right.)

We found, "Children will still come to Neverland..." SO, she went to sleep assured that she would have her turn soon.

Thank you, Google. And good night.

Potato Tits

I've been helping out in the kitchen lately. No, no...I'm not saying that I just recently started feeding my 6-year-old, I mean I've been helping out in the SCHOOL kitchen. Along with that comes the oven burns, flour hair, and local stories of other kitchen chefs.

One particular noteworthy one made it impossible for me to stay away from the blog (despite previous months and months of impressive sloth). Try to digest the following....Apparently, one unfortunate day, the head lady of the nearby school set about mashing her potatoes with particular fervor and zeal. In her haste to prepare the lunch, she neglected to don the required, provided apron. In fact, seemingly she must have been in a rush all morning, as she must not have managed to dress in a bra, or for that matter a shirt with coverage, because during the height of mashing her tit fell out into the potatoes. Yes, that's right. Go on re-read it, but it'll still say the same thing.

Now this hasteful woman could have tried to cut her losses and dip the tit in cool water, and get on with the mashing. Instead, she is suing the school for her burn and subsequently has had to produce said burned tit for her male supervisors. Frankly, it makes me wonder if there have been previous kitchen incidents involving head trauma....or maybe it's all down to natural genius?

Science and Religion

Current Biology: "According to a study published last year by the University of Minnesota, Americans distrust atheists more than any other minority group, including homosexuals, recent immigrants or Muslims."

YIKES.

But, the Englishman to the rescue of American politics.....

"The Democrats and Republicans may be preparing for battle in next year's presidential election but Richard Dawkins is on a new battle bus promoting atheism. (Photo: www.richarddawkins.net)

Dawkins appeared as one of the stars of the Atheist Alliance convention in Crystal City, Virginia, last month. He admitted that he was a little bit hesitant about being an Englishman talking to Americans and he showed “a certain amount of deference” when asked about US politics. “But I think that this country is so powerful and what goes on politically here is so enormously influential, the rest of the world is entitled to have a say.”

Although religious groups denounce him on websites and radio talk shows, he has not received abuse at public meetings; religious people tended not to turn up — “which in a way is a shame”, he said."

Yeah, basically because even the biggest religious zealots know that they would, as an old friend would say, be ripped a new asshole.

November 11, 2007

It began a very rushed, but somber, wet day. Remembrance Day. The British day that memorialized the end of WWI: when the guns fell silent on the 11th hour of the 11th day of the 11th month, 1918. We traversed train obstacles and crowded London streets to watch the marching armed forces place their poppy wreaths at the Cenotaph. Then we meandered towards some guards for some photo ops and found ourselves heading in the direction of Buckingham Palace, so we went with it. I got a refill on my lavender scent at the Queen’s shop and we walked on, being led by our tummies now. We decided to alight at Leicester Square for a little romantic Mexican treat. It was the sight of one of our first dinners in England and one of the few places to get that ethnicity food in England. My, I felt so satisfied with our day, especially after the nachos and Mexican melon drink, a burrito with sides of beans and rice with guacamole and salsa, and topped off with some fried ice cream. I popped a fuzzy toothbrush in my mouth and then we rolled on.

But we didn’t make it that far. Yards from the restaurant-front the European premiere of Beowulf was kicking off—fire, furred drumming Viking men, big screen, red carpet and all. And then the stars came out. We watched as Neil Gaiman, Crispin Glover, and Anthony Hopkins strolled their way down to the Vue theater. Then Ray Winstone graced us with his gentlemanly presence. He kindly autographed a paper for Noel and called her a “Sweetheart” before generously continuing on to sign his name for a good portion of the onlookers. Then the (embarrassing) shrieking began. Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie emerged from the just arrived Mercedes and immediately became the center of attention. They waffled this way and that, signing for the demanding crowds as they went….until they drifted to our corner. When Brad spotted Noel, he stopped, took the notepad she offered, and after signing his initials collected Angelina in order to do the same. He pointed to Noel and she flashed a brilliant smile before autographing the notebook and handing it back to Noel. Brad Pitt is a good guy.

(Paul has an even better picture of Brad pointing at Noel to get Angelina to sign...)

The sweet moment

The sweet, sweet moment of finally being able to flush the toilet with a button after weeks of using a bucket....was lost so quickly when my glasses dropped from my face, bounced off my 5-year-old, and then straight into the bog....